Good Coaches are Always Needed
This is part three of the Four Stages of Parenting Series.
We have covered the caregiver and cop stages of parenting already. Now we will move into the coaching stage.
The coaching stage begins when you start to teach you child the ins and outs of life, about morales, and values.
When I think about coaching I think back to my baseball days. I played college baseball and the coach I had the opportunity to play for was a one of a kind guy. When looking back at what he instilled in the players that played for him and what he expected of them he did everything that we as parents are supposed to do when coaching our children.
Here are five things that every coach should possess:
- Leadership: As a coach of you team (your family) you are the leader of. Your children will look to you for guidance, comfort, love, and many many other things. As a coach you have to be ready to lead them because they are looking to you for that. Your children will learn from you as any player will learn from a coach. So be sure that you are teaching and leading you kids in the right direction.
- Discipline: A good coach is not afraid to discipline his players. Like in the cop stage of parenting the coach stage also has to have discipline. However, in this stage there will be greatly different boundaries that will try to be crossed. It will go from throwing food to getting in late from curfew. Like any good coach though a good parent will always stick to their rules and never let one slide. If that happens the team will run over them.
- Teaching: All great coaches are great teachers. They find a way to communicate what they want to their players. As a parent we must find a way to teach our kids what we want them to achieve. We have to teach them about the Bible if we want them to learn about it. We cannot rely on the world to teach them this.
- Wins and Losses: Every great coach that I have ever had not dwelled on the losses for very long. They take what they can learn from them and move on. What good does dwelling on those losses bring? Nothing but a downward spiral. So we as parents have to know that we will not always get it right all the time. We will fail. Probably more times that we will like. Like any good coach thought we must never dwell on it. We must learn from it, and be there for the team and encourage them to move on.
IfWhen we screw up as parent we must not dwell but push on. Show your kids you love them and push on. - Love God: This is one thing that my coach from college just oozed. He loved the Lord and everyone knew it. That is the way that we must be as coaches of our kids. There must never be any doubt in their mind that we love the Lord. That we want to serve him daily and show the love of Christ to all of those we come across. Kids learn so much from their parent. I do not think personally for me that there is any greater thing that I want to show and teach to my son!
Those are just four of the many things that I learned from the great college coach on being a parent. It really is amazing how many life lessons that I was able to learn while on the baseball field.
So as a coach of your family be that leader that your children want. Do not be afraid to mess up, because you will. Lead with a Godly heart, and show the love of Christ to your children. That is what they want more than anything. Just to know that you love, and will be there for them.
What are some other traits that every good coach should possess?
Dustin (114)
Bill (cycleguy) (106)
Brandon (106)
ThatGuyKC (95)
Michael (92)
Moe (70)
seekingpastor (57)
Ben (56)
Steven (46)
Sean Sabourin (44)
Great points. I think I would add that a good coach leads by example. I remember playing hoops in junior high and running cross country in high school. In both cases, my coaches played and ran alongside us. They set an example. They didn’t just coach from the side line. I think this is a good thing to remember for parenting and for life leadership.
Great addition Jon. The example we set is so very important!
Love the list but don’t forget Patience. It is key in proving you are the head of the house and comforting your children!
So true man. Since the birth of my son I have really had to work on this…
Adam,
I think all great coaches see more in you than you see in yourself. It’s not an overt, boisterous type of leadership. It’s a quiet, “I believe in you” spirit that is not so common.
So true! Interesting enough, I find myself seeking out others to find out wht they see in me, knowing that my perspective can be skewed and wanting the validation of a coach (someone that knows me and has some interest in me).
Nice. Love that one! Thanks for sharing.
Great list, Adam.
I’d add: Strong character, always honest, and always learning.
Great additions Dustin. Thanks for sharing!
I really like your point about wins and losses. Really great coaches take what they can learn from losses and then focus back on wins. That’s some great advice.
Thanks Alex.
I really like the concept of a coach. I can’t lead my child’s life for them – however, they do need a coach to help them along the way.
One aspect of coaching that has been big on my heart lately is “Being Intentional”. There are so many things that I want to teach my kids, things that I want to do with them, examples I want to set for them. Very little of this will happen unless I am intentional about it.
Truth man! Love it. Thanks for sharing Steven!
Steve, you’re right on. I think we can be so self-focused that we miss out completely on the “being intentional” part. I want to make the most of my time as a parent.